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Monday, January 18, 2010

what shall we overcome?


here is maya with some of the many denizens of mayaland, and miles and maya getting ready for the starr king peace march/martin luther king memorial. lately maya has been very very into her small world play, creating and acting out tiny scenes, with meticulous setting, characters, conflicts, resolutions, more conflicts, new settings. these scenes often involve mean stepsisters, parents and children, brothers and sisters, and jealous characters who want what others have. there are occasional changes of heart and wonderful compromises and surprise endings. i have to admit i enjoy entering this small world. miles on the other hand is entering the big world more and more. the world of money, politics, natural disasters, teams. in between thinking about star wars toys, of course.

everyone was sick all weekend but the cabin fever was murderous today so i took miles to the exploratorium for a little while. on the way he started the "what i want for my next toy" conversation which i steered away to talking about the good parts about buying less things, and which ended up veering into dangerously big world territory including haiti and kids with no homes, food, parents. at the museum he went straight up the stairs to see the decomposition exhibit which in the past has contained very decomposed creatures vaguely resembling rodents or birds, with beetles busily swarming over and through extremely thin and faded feathers or bones. today it was a fairly shocking white rat which had just been placed in the tank this morning. it looked as if it was curling up peacefully asleep, but with beetles climbing into its ears and eyes and over its tail. very intriguing, but i think a little disturbing to miles. on the way home the subject of chicken came up, and the big question about chicken dog (who, as you remember, went on the dog only ferry to the island of dogs almost five years ag0)--is he dead yet? and what would happen to his body? and would i be sad if he was dead?

we read the book martin's big words a few nights in a row and i ended up in tears two times. i guess i am not alone but martin luther king is certainly someone to cry about. miles tried ot reassure me by saying that the man who killed him is dead now.

so what do we do with these kids when the big world is such a mess? my reading list lately: reread ishi in two worlds (this is an incredibly sad and yet somehow inspiring story--i just found out recently that the author was ursula leguin's mother--she grew up with two anthropologist parents and went on to write stories set in the distant future, but with many elements of the northern california indian's culture), read the value of nothing, and have been obsessively rereading old ursula leguin. martin's big words. star wars forces of darkness. bone the dragonslayer. the new yorker. pop up fairies and magical creatures. it is so tempting to keep the kids in the world of fantasy and toys and safety, but then i want them to grow up and start caring about the big world, want to work to make it better. how do we start this path in our kids? the world seems such a mess, so much to overcome, and these guys are going to be the ones to do it. i can't just grab my son's lego star wars ship out of his hands and sharply remind him that their are kids in the world with no food to eat, that every plastic toy he gets kills a tree, what a rotton mom i would be. we try to show we share some of our money, we try to teach the kids how to respect everyone even if we don't love them, we try to recycle and walk and help our friends, but it is so so hard to teach by example. unless it is an amazing example of humanhood, of which rich and i are not.

i am glad miles is at a school which celebrated martin luther king day blasting we shall overcome and blocking the streets around the school off with police cars so the kids could walk in the streets with their signs and get a taste of civil disobedience. even if miles and his buddy were chatting about basketball the whole time.

and i am glad maya is working it out with her little tiny people and animals and box houses and story cloths.

how to move towards big world changes when it is so hard to make it work in the little teeny tiny world of our family. i know it is all about education, but whose? and when, and what, and where, and how? we need a new wh song. we need to start figuring this out together, a little faster and a little clearer now.

bye

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