tacolicious fundraiser

tacolicious on valencia street at 18th is supporting my kids' school, starr king elementary.
they are giving a nice chunk of their profits from each monday in september to the school.  the owners have kids in another san francisco public school and do this as a very generous way to give back to the larger community.  so go to tacolicious and splurge on delicious tacos and drinks.  i went last night and liked the tuna tostadas, the heirloom tomato salad, and the pitchers of margaritas--one regular, one with watermelon.  remind me that i am too old to drink alcohol on a work night, though.  none of the kids seemed to mind that i had a headache all day.

seward slides

day 5 summer vacation 2011

we found and rode the seward street slides. i had heard about these for years and finally checked them out. two old concrete slides dug into a hillside by a community garden, with a couple nice curves and drops. there was a community garden above and an old playground below. the one on the right is fastest, and riding on cardboard adds a little speed. of course i met someone there i vaguely knew--a fellow public school mom (sunset, an awesome school) and teacher (at alvarado). it made me wince inside to see her reaction about miles being at starr king--"the mandarin immersion program, i hope." i guess it will be a while before people consider starr king as a good school for kids in all programs. kind of sad.

we park-hopped to walter haas where we hooked up with two of miles' classmates and ate hard-boiled eggs and cherries and olives. the girls rollerbladed, miles played soccer and got loud, and...maya did several monkey bars on her own!!! something just clicked for her. very exciting.

grey sky, summer cold, miles at a friend's house, rocket sleeping on a pillow.

secret garden

friday night we went and saw bossy dudes and rainbow moods, short plays by short people, performed at the DeYoung museum, which was once again wonderful and heartwarming and amazing. i laughed, i cried. there are people out there, and they come to MY KID'S SCHOOL who are teaching narrative skills through playmaking and we are all lucky to have them. go stagewrite.

saturday we hiked up potrero hill for our tree-watering team orientation. friends of the urban forest planted nine trees along the sidewalk on coral road by starr king and they will need lots of tlc this summer to survive. so we learned about the bucket and plastic bag method of irrigation, found out where the water could be turned on, and were teamed with a partner family who will join us once every five weeks or so in our quest to keep these slender guys alive. yet another commitment but how can you say no to watering baby trees?

the kids got a peek at the learning garden which is only accessed by 3rd grade at starr king for some mysterious reason. maya and a few kindergarteners were very busy pumping water from the rainwater catchment barrel and pouring it on the plants while miles and his buddies hunched over a table in the bungalow playing yu-gi-oh. it was a beautiful day with blue sky and wind. on the way up maya picked up a dead baby bird she found on the sidewalk by the parking garage. it was very sad, but she decided that if we took care of the trees the birds could make nests in them and the babies would be safer. we are seeing desperate nests all over the place lately, eggs on stone ledges, nests on parking garages. many little birds are flying in and out of the overgrown jasmine in our backyard. one nest of eggs was savaged by a big old raccoon.

then a preschool alumni reunion in glen park followed by the fireballs' last soccer game of the season which...they won. woo hoo.

summer is almost here and i am feeling the call of rivers and big trees and even a faint call for a child-free getaway to a hot springs somewhere up north. i have been obsessively worrying about how my daughter will fare in kindergarten, and trying not to. i think she is feeling it, or feeling the end of preschool,because it has been a time of much yelling and crying and "you don't love me anymore." she is a mess and i assume it is my fault. we need some quality time in nature, or at least i do, getting away from all the arbitrariness of weekdays and weekends and school years.

heard a guy on NPR today talking about how kids who grew up in the 80s were taught that government was incompetent and or bad by watching shows such as the a-team, dukes of hazzard, and even ghostbusters. it was scary how much sense his argument made.

and today in my garden i harvested a bunch of greens, carrots, onions. i planted some tomato plants just as a big wind kicked into the afternoon. whoosh whoosh. miles was picked up and taken to the house of air. maya acted out a story where a sculpey horse and a sculpey snail were cruel to a sculpey sheep. he was perfect and they were either broken or overcooked and they would not be kind to the sheep unless he broke off his ear. which he did not. i put her to bed early and then miles returned from his party. he lay in bed next to me, this often rude little dude, and rocket cuddled between us as i read him two chapters from his surprising new book of interest, the secret garden. i have held on to this copy since childhood. miles may be growing up, and may not want to water trees, or even come play in our own backyard garden often, but i can see that this book holds him in the same way it held me a long long time ago. and that is nice.

pathetic parenting moment

last night i trailed behind a fast-moving and funny dragon composed of a bunch of fast-moving and funny 2nd-4th graders in the chinese new year parade. in front of the dragon were the bunny dancers and fan dancers. it was a cold and drizzly night and i felt very alive in the bright lights and music, sipping a delicious manhattan a fellow parent handed me mid-parade as we wound our way through the downtown streets.

maybe this is wierd narcissism, immaturity, obsessive thinking, getting older, who knows, but lately more and more when i am feeling the most alive, joyful, amazed, or loved i also think about dying. it happens more and more. i felt it last night as part of a spectacle, this fierce love of being alive and the thought of being dead. i know this is a subject i need to come to grips with a little better. maybe it is time to get some religion unless anyone has a better suggestion.

tonight, my seven-year-old dragon dancer surprised me by echoing my thoughts. in a happy family moment, drawing together at the table he looked right at me and said "i hate thinking that i'm going to die." my pathetically inadequate response was to hug him and say "then don't think about that."

a house or a place to live and food

the sun makes it all so much better. aahh. after a rainy stretch life is beautiful and full and warm again. in the starr king open space all is green and flowers are starting to bloom.

feeling spoiled rotten i bussed it to noe valley with maya where i got some fancy clothes with christmas gift certificates. for her birthday maya picked out "the most beautiful paper plates and napkins, ever" (i think they were left over from hanuhkah). we also cashed in a noe valley bakery gift certificate for a shi-shi cake. we lounged at home, had a picnic of bunny pasta in the sun on the deck, and then borrowed a huge pile of library books. i know it is a parenting no-no, but days like this i feel like my kids are my best friends. especially my little girl, lately.

we went to pick miles up from school and he was practicing for the chinese new year parade with his buddies. in between carrying the dragon they played a wicked game of handball while maya climbed around on the playground and me. my starr king girl gang and i hung out and talked about, well, school stuff, but also our upcoming party for a friend at a new mexican restaurant in the mission, gracias madre.

i am going out tonight to see rich's band play. supposedly j mascis will be jamming with them for a song. this brings me way back to that heady elation and angst of being 21 and blasting dinosaur jr. in my cheap little boom box. probably mishearing and mis-singing the lyrics, "don't let me fuck up will you, 'cause when i need a friend it's still you."

miles told me that he was the kid selected from his class to speak at the martin luther king peace celebration today. don't ask me how he was selected, i doubt it was for good behavior. we have been reading an amazing book, martin's big words, which makes me tear up every time i read it. miles said his dream in chinese first. then he said "i have a dream everyone will have a house or a place to live and food." which could be something he heard someone else say and didn't put much thought into, but i prefer to think he is learning something good from living in this crazy neighborhood in the big bad city.

school talk

another fabulous starr king bday party with our warm and diverse school crowd. soccer? check. miles in sports and friends heaven? check. families speaking different languages? check. families of all income levels and backgrounds getting along just swell? check. delicious spread of food? check. warm fuzzy feeling watching the kids together and knowing so many friendly faces? check.

but a few times at this party i had to walk away from conversations regarding school. the conversation where people discuss how they are supporting their kid in chinese, with websites, tutors, trips. we are not really doing that. and the conversation with one parent in particular which is inevitable--she is so aware of the things i don't like about public schools and i fall into this groove with her, about the test prep aspect of learning, lack of choices for kids, shallowness of learning, lack of intrinsically rewarding work, etc etc. go read alfie kohn. it is like talking to him.

so, pros and cons. it is a done deal for miles but i am still debating things for maya, and considering, possibly, applying to a reggio emilio charter school which is opening.

this decision, like so many others, is based on a choice between what may be flawed, but what is a part of our lives, and our community, and that which seems better (at least more progressive, and less focused on producing good little workers of the future), but which is not familiar. i tend to want to keep people together, but maybe this is not always the right thing to do.

i want to find balance in this area. maya and i were at the academy of sciences at the climate change exhibit and the lonely dad of a not yet talking toddler approached us and spoke of how all the suggestions to make changes towards sustainability might be useless at this point. it certainly does not seem like making decisions based on what is best for everyone is our species' strong point. i guess the problem with changing things like our unsustainable lifestyles, or the school where we might send our younger kid, is that *most" human beings, even when they can see the negatives, choose to go with what gives them community. this means sticking with what you know.

principal's chat

at miles' school there are occasional scheduled principal's chats on monday mornings. these chats consist of the principal answering questions posed by parents who do not have to go to work, while younger siblings are silenced by a tray of mexican pastries or sticky buns and the eye candy of iphones.

so many involved parents at miles' school with questions about things like "how are teachers dealing with the subject of race via the caring schools curriculum?" and "how will low-income parents access the tutoring their child is entitled to?" and "can we get a working microphone for morning assembly?"

there are so many huge issues to deal with in this one public school. there are issues between parents with different sets of values and priorities. issues between teachers and students with different values and priorities. issues between parents and the school bureaucracy that forces teachers to teach so broadly, touching on a thousand standards rather than letting the kids get deep into a project, and do some critical thinking. issues between parents and our larger society which does not place much priority on providing a good education for our kids.

it can be overwhelming. i look at my kids and obsessively worry that they are not getting what they need in this stressed out system. that there is a scary vicious cycle going on in which people are not educated to think and do in a way that is fair, sustainable, creative, caring, peaceful. then they grow up and become the leaders in a society where good education is not a priority. and it gets worse and worse, and stupider and stupider.

i don't just worry about my kids, i worry about the generations to come. so corny, but to me educating kids should be the absolute top priority for our society if we think beyond the next year or two.

miles the werewolf at school halloween parade

isn't this a cute werewolf? don't you just want to take off that mask and hug him?