3 parties one day

today was a tough day. lots of crying and misery and neighbors all around to hear it. hopefully we will all get some restorative sleep.

maybe today was somehow related to yesterday...three birthday parties in one day--with no tears or tantrums at all. we spent the morning at the skate park celebrating jonah's 6th. friends and friendly friends of friends, lots of talk about work and kids and all the little dudes skating around on the sidewalk--and then abandoning this work to play pirates. and eat cake. then miles and i headed to the new world of his school buddy's high-density condo complex downtown. i was kind of amazed at the indoor courtyard and the mixed use neighborhood. it would be so easy here--a gym, a food store, a library, a bus, all on the block. and no poor elderly man walking around in his hospital shirt, pants down around his knees, wearing NO UNDERWEAR (we saw this guy yesterday between birthday soirees and he made such a big impact on miles that he had a dream about it). the kids i picture miles being shy around were within minutes speaking googoo with him, wrestling, chasing in circles, and one little girl was even riding on his back. then it was off to the quiet peace of brisbane, where most of the homes are festooned with giant lighted pentagrams and we celebrated the second bday of calvin, who may be the number one slugger in the tiny blonde baby league. the kids tried to catch the neighbor's cat with various evil traps until it was too dark

so, maybe the kids with their cake hangovers weren't the only ones miserable today. too much stimulus for me. our neighborhood, with some cool folks but some yucchy piles of stuff and nudity too, and the ever-present knowledge that more good friends will be fleeing this city for a home of their own to own soon? downtown clean and glassy and removed from the dirt on our ground? or a little town close by, where no one locks the door and all was quiet as we drove home at 7:00? and all the couples--watching them manage being couples, and all the parents-- watching them manage their kids, and all the kids growing up with supersonic speed and my two babies navigating it all as best they can.

sometimes i really don't feel wise enough to help them grow up.

too many options, too much sugar. a preview of the holiday season. time to focus on where we are, who our family is, and of course christmas presents. can we make them this year? can we not fly into the tornado of greed and letdowns? the kids have been studying toy catalogues and even maya is starting to say what she wants "for halloween"

will we help out at a shelter somehow with our kid?

again there is no focus with this post and i am sorry, but somehow all these thoughts will compost someday, and become something fresh and new.