who are these little people?

just returned from trick or treating. i have to say it's getting better each year. we went up 24th street and got candy from walgreen's, 2 liquor/party stores, the laundromat, the barber next to the park,world pioneer video, punjab, an unknown but good-smelling chinese restaurant, manivanh thai, two taquerias, a mysterious clothing store that materialized in the last 48 hours, and pop's bar (pictured above). sugarlump the ultra hip cafe was out of candy but very apologetic. there were a few cute little princesses and thomas the trains but mostly serious ghouls, grim reapers with blinking red eyes, dark witches, etc. we then returned down 23rd street which had tons of open gates and doors and decorations. the density of this area makes it easy to collect a lot of candy without walking too far. as we waited for one house to bring us candy and they never appeared a shy man appeared from the dark house next door mumbling trick or treat and pulled a dollar out of his wallet for miles. one guy was lowering a bucket of lollipops on a rope from his 2nd floor flat. million fishes had wierd stuff up like a giant stuffed flying cow and a tree with glowing purple leaves which had the kids wondering. one house had rainbow rave lights dancing on the sidewalk but no candy. my favorite house was a cool guy at the top of a steep steps carving a pumpkin while blasting danzig.

so tonight mother pumpkin will come and take all the candy miles didn't shove down his throat and leave him a toy, in this case a snow leopard. she is going a little far this year, in my opinion, but what can we do? then mother pumpkin , ahem,will distribute the candy to all the poor kids who didn't get to go trick or treating this year. our son is still such a little innocent and has no suspicions, only practical questions, like how will she know he is asleep, etc.

so i pretty much controlled myself around the throngs of kids and parents in our neighborhood tonight and only asked ONE parent where her kids went to school. they lived right by bryant so i assumed they went there but oops, they go to private school. and i saw one mom friend and she is in the kindergarten hunt and is looking only at spanish immersion for her 2 kids who are already bilingual.

there is a lot of cheap chocolate coursing through my veins so i better get working on my homework before i crash into ccandy dreams. more school stuff in a few days, i promise. i bet you can't wait.

day of the dead

we just got your drawing and we miss you, miss nina. here are you and miles in your baby love cuddling in a cool house up above stinson beach.



this friday is the day of the dead
procession and altars near our house. this is always an emotional event. it is dark and the air smells of strong incense and there are burning colored powders on the sidewalk on 24th street. the artists are all intent. one year we saw a vehicle from the underworld, a giant pedaled car driven by two huge skeletons, all metal with huge metal wheels and a twisting drill on the front, shooting fire. in garfield park people drift from altar to altar. pictures of little children with tiny toys and flowers and more incense. photos of aunts and grandmas and fathers and friends and even pets. little books and scribbled notes and treasures. a puppet show of skulls in bright clothing. skeletons dance by in stilts. it is strange and not menacing and moving so you should check it out.

this year i will think of my grandparents, j.h. rich's lost childhood friends, m.n. of p.o.d., chicken, daisy, and of course dear dear dear dear dear mr tedd.

a long email from a neighbor mom

my, aren't i feeling productive? maya is taking a nice long nap and i am cooking a big pot of lentil soup with produce from our farm (eatwell farms, that is). we carved a "really cute and spooooooooooooooky pumpkin" before 8 am this morning, with very little controversy aout whose pumpkin it really was. it's a grey, still, day. miles wore his puffy jacket to school. yesterday was sunny and warm, we played in albany for che che's 2nd birthday and then miles and maya and our little neighbor downstairs turned our backyard into a mudwallow, water throwing, plant drowning and spray running through and screaming parTAY that reached right into the homestretch of dinner and bedtime.

but enough of that. as i said last time, this blog will now be used for the official business of obsessively considering every angle of every school in sf unified.

here are the ones on my mind at the moment:

if we do immersion:
leonard flynn
marshall
alvarado
buena vista
fairmount

below is a LONG and helpful email about immersion and choosing schools from a neighbor mom of another boy names miles, whose son goes to leonard flynn:

HER WORDS:
The short and sweet is, I am very happy with Flynn, and immersion. The Kindergarten teachers are really great and work closely with each other (2 English and 2 Spanish). The kindergarteners all have recess and lunch together. The school has a lot of momentum which is great and I think always fun to be a poart of something that is on its way up. It was interesting to see in touring last year how some of the schools seem to be on the rise, some seem to be plateau-ing (my sense at Alvarado which I put 7th on my list) and others were dipping a bit. Sometimes that's due to Principal turnover which was my impression at both Alvarado and Buena Vista last year.

We were seeking Spanish Immersion and 5 of my 7 choices were SPI. We chose Flynn first because it was so close and because in interviewing parents (on their way to school past my house!) everyone seemed happy with the school. So we thought, we're going to do this! Support our neighborhood school and be involved! It appealed to me to be another middle class family to participate in an up and coming school because the reality of all public schools is that when middle class families send their kids there, they usually bring with them energy, money, organization etc which benefits ALL the kids there.

We also had Fairmount on our list which has a great set of extra programs and good principal leadership and strong PTA. Also a very nice library. Also on our list were Monroe, Alvarado and BV (and Harvey Milk and Rooftop).

The PTA at Flynn makes almost no money ($31,000 last year as compared to the $200,000 that Alvarado makes) but the PTA is active and growing. The fundraising is more challenging because the population of the school is quite poor. We are just not a school that can have fundraising auctions or gala dinners. On the other hand, as a poorer school we get more money from the district, and we are eligible for grants like the grant that chose Flynn for one of 10 new place structures in the State last May (part of Maria Shriver's CaliforniaVolunteer effort.) Flynn also has a great upgraded library/Media center which was christened in 2005 and will soon implement a $125,000 yard greening grant they were awarded. Lot of things are happening.

Here is the "enhanced listing" about Flynn on Great Schools.net http://www.greatschools.net/cgi-bin/ca/pqview/6366

Also attached is a piece one of the parents wrote last year. I would add to it that the Principal, Mr. Addcox is a very calm, elegant Latino man who I think sets great tone for the school, and is a great role model as well.

I bleive that the English program is just as good, but it seems scarier because the English only classes ar enot as diverse - meaning they are msotly Latino and black and I think the uncertainty about that can make white parents nervous. But what I am seeing is that in any given class there might be a problem kid or two, but that will be true in any class in the district. The reality is that the district in general has very few white kids and even schools with more caucasian kids, only have about 20-30 percent max. Our hope is that more middle class families of any race will choose Flynn because any time a school is chosen, it means the parents wanted their kids there and are maybe more invested in their child's education - which is good for any school.

Flynn is doing tours on Thursdays at 9:00. No appointment necessary. Just meet outside the office. Also there is a Kindergaretn Information night on Nov 29.

and more questions from me, and her answers in red...

yes, this is daunting. i find myself thinking about WAY too many variables. diversity, money,equity, safety, random bad kinder teachers I've seen, proximity to home, school hours, enrichment, and now...immersion. I did this too - had my spreadsheet, rated the things most important to me etc. If you use greatschools.net you can create a list of schools you are interested in and then sort them by many things: ethnic make up of a school, scores, size etc.
i just started considering it because i was afraid miles wouldn't like school if he couldn't understand what was happening. now I guess my questions are more along these lines...
do you think/have you read any research that english-speaking kids in this kind of program end up being fluent writers in english as well as spanish? i really want miles to be a fluent writer.

do you understand why this model works for kids who don't know spanish when historically kids who didn't speak english did poorly in english only instruction? i'm very confused about this, as i know the district created bilingual education for kids who came in with only chinese or spanish partly because many didn't succees when put in "english immersion". Here's what I think: The old model of just sticking an immigrant kid into school and expecting them to learn english as lessons are being taught may not have worked for these reasons: first, immersion is not for every child. There are Sp-speaking kids at Flynn who are in the Spanish immersion program where they will move slowly toward English, while learning the skills of kindergarten (reading, writing, early math) in theoir native language.

There are other SP-speaking kids who went directly into the all English classes (they are in Immersion themselves). I think this decision may be based solely on what's best for the kid. Whether the kid has an aptitude for language, what the priorities of the family are, whether they have any other variables (immaturity, inability to focus or whatever) that might hinder their success in immersion. Also the old model may not have addressed the fact that the kids didn't speak any of the language. In immersion, it's all about insuring they come to understand what's going on through repetition and pictures and acting it out. I see that Miles is learning Spanish exactly the same way he learned English - through attention to the repetition and putting the patterns of language together. "She used that word "pack" the other day when she put things in a lunchbox, now she used it while putting clothes in a suitcase." Make mental note.

One other thing is that (to grossly generalize) one of the primary problems that immigrant and lower economic status kids face is that in the early years they have not been read to or spoken to to the degree that middle class parents do. I read a fascinating study recently about how we can pour all the money we want to into education now to get poor kids up to speed, but the necessary building blocks of language and learning are laid in the early years of hearing many many different kinds of words, and that they many never really catch up because of the missed opportunity when they were little.

what happens after 5th grade? i'm assuming miles would be a fluent spanish speaker by then, but would he retain his great new language skills when he transitioned to a non-spanish academic setting, where he might or might not have spanish speaking peers? I heard, in touring many immersion schools last year, that children may not score as well as their non-immersion peers on English tests in the grammar school years. But that by 6th grade, and on up, they score above average in all language-related testing. I don't know if this is about native English speakers or if the statistics include all immersion kids who come from either English or Spanish backgrounds. I have not been concerned about Miles falling too far behind in English. I figure we will always be reading and speaking English using lots of big words. Also I think that there will be a huge pool of kids going into Jr High from Spanish immersion and that many more schools will have immersion level courses in Jr High. My hairdresser's daughter went through immersion at Alvarado, then had some immeriosn coursses at James Lick (in Noe Valley) and now is at Lowell, and completely fluent - worked last summer speaking all Spnish at her job.)

i, too, would love to be part of an up and coming neighborhood school but i really am nervous about immersion. people keep telling me they think it's great but don't seem to know many details about how the program affects kids academically, other than the fact that being bilingual is good for people's brains in general. From my own experience of learning languages (at different points, I studied French, Spanish and Italian) is that it really makesyour brain work hard to order things, and that there are many skills to be gained from the leanring of a language.

Honestly, I think if you have some interest in Miles learning another language you should try it. Then if it's not a good fit, transfer him out the next year or the next or the next. (It is MUCH easier to get into any elementary school in the district after the kindergarten year!) I thought: we'll try the neighborhood school and enjoy the benefits of it being close by and all. He'll learn some Spanish which will be good for his brain evenif he doesn't continue. And if in a couple years it doesn't seem like a good fit (I fear that a chasm will grown between Miles' abilities and those of his peers as they get older) that we can transfer to another school - immersion or otherwise.

The choosing of a school is ultimately so subjective. Some schools will speak to you more than others, and ultimately the program itself may not be the most important factor. Get a feel for the teachers, the environment, the play yard, the library, the way of life. Keep in mind your own sanity - you may love a school like Sherman on Union and Franklin but try to envision the twice daily round trip haul across town. Does that still make the school "ideal"? I loved Miraloma - liked it best of all the schools I saw, but didn't put it on my list as it was too far and too early. Just a lifestyle choice. I wasn't totally wowed by Flynn. I had some concerns that maybe they didn't have enough arts prgrams or whatever. But I liked that we could walk, that the school has momentum, and I oved the library and liked the pricipal. We did want him to learn Spanish so that was big. Would Miles do better at Miraloma than Flynn? I doubt it. As a Mom, would I? Doubt it!

wow, that's a lot. but i swear, that much thought about the schools is flowing through my brain approximately every 5 minutes, and it happens a lot late at night. like between 2 and 5 in the morning.

here are the non-immersion schools currently on my radar:

miraloma

sf community

moscone

grattan

rooftop

harvey milk?

alvarado?

mckinley?

creative arts charter school

oh, now maya is awakening. the soup is bubbling away. if anyone has anything to share about these schools or others, join in please!!

love

jamie

sfusd taking over blog

so, we have begun school tours. i have spent a lot of time already looking at schools online, talking with parents, etc. i've been trying to make some decisions this way and it just isn't working. every time i hear something good about a school or program i think we should go for that. and vice versa. so for the next 6 weeks or so i am going to try really hard to justr be open-minded and look at schools and see how i feel about them and their programs. i'm going to use this blog as a way to help myself sort out thoughts and would LOVE if anyone out there reading who is in the same place we are wants to comment. i'm not going to try and write a guide of the different schools but more describe my reactions to them. we will see what happens!!

yesterday was my first tour, at miraloma. definitely not close to home, but could easily be a stop on the way to work. the parents here are very proud, involved and excited. we had 2 parent tour guides who were fighting each other for the chance to talk about how happy they were. the school is in a nice area. it is big and clean. a nice garden. a computer lab and tech teacher. the pta raises more than 100,000 and there are lots of enrichment programs during and after school. the classes are a little smaller than average. i felt like i was in a middle to upper class crowd of prospective parents, many of whom were looking at both public and private. there were several questions about GATE and how advanced children were taught in the 4/5 class. as we looked at rooms the kids were quiet and it was orderly and calm. i didn't feel a lot of excitement from kids or teachers, but i am used to pre-k where the kids are jumping and running and forgetting to use indoor voices.

from what i could see the upper classes looked very diverse and the lower grades quite white.
why does this matter?

on my school tour today at sf community i asked the lead teacher why she thought it mattered. this school is also nice physically, with big rooms and high ceilings, a great outdoor space and garden, but in a neighborhood with glass on the sidewalk and even a blanket on the ground outside the adjacent boys and girls club that looked like someone slept on. the school serves about 50% neighorhood kids, some from bayview, some from bernal, some from the mission. i had spoken beforehand with 2 parents from parents for public schools who had kids there and they ahd spoken of the diversity of the kids but i guess after miraloma i was a little surprised to see all the black and brown faces. all this stuff is really deep, looking at schools bringing up issues of difference and sameness and equity and equality. each school is unique. sf community seems to have great teachers except for one overwhelmed looking kindergarten newbie who i'm sure will improve. they are a teacher led school. they have project based learning for half the year, which is found at only one other school in the district. this type of learning is very appealing to me. there is a little bit of art and music but i think we would mostly be doing that on our own. the majority of the kids at this school come from poor families and i don't see this school becoming a hot and popular place like miraloma, ever, because of the neighborhood. so there will be no super strong pta and less parent volunteers in the classroom, etc. anyway, the lead teacher's answer, about how diversity helps us learn about other people who are different from us,and how to negotiate and get along with these people, was so heartfelt i actually got a tear in my eye.

so i think i have seen 2 extremes so far in terms of the diversity/socioeconomic issues in the district. can i get over my own nervousness about being unable to connect and negotiate and understand people from another culture? i know my school experience was one of sameness, and then of desegregation in principle, but tracking and separation in reality.

also i have been thinking more about how it would be so much green and also more peaceful to send the kids to school nearby. so that has me thinking more about spanish immersion, because there are 2 schools with spanish immersion within walking distance.


here is a real quote. miles asked me this morning if the school i was going to see was a spanish kindergarten. we ended up in a little kindergarten discussion and i was telling him about how all the schools had different good things. some have art, some have sports, some have spanish, some have computers.

"some have money" he chimed in. really!! i guess he has been overhearing mroe than i thought. or he is smarter than i thought.

this is all pretty interesting so far, let's hope i don't have a nervous breakdown. i still think i would like to send miles to a progressive private school but i am not feeling the same anxiety about the city schools versus those renowned suburban public schools.

buh bye

a knight and 2 dragons, one pooping

ok, so i know i should be sleeping because i am getting quite loopy, but i just had to send this out, it makes me laugh.

i freakin LOVE this rebecca

rebecca sent me this website link. any san francisco parents out there please go to this website and read. send to friends. bye

l.a. schools guide

the magician

today there was a lot of talk about the magician we saw at the randall museum. thought i would include a link. magicians aren't exactly my thing but maybe they are yours. he made me laugh a lot.

here's the link

see, i really am a supergeek!!!

wierd guy in tree near million fishes

here is a wierd little guy we saw in a tree on 23rd stree near bryant. i suspect someone from million fishes
but who knows? he had a few friends. this little art collective puts cool stuff in their first floor storefront windows and always leave their doors open during the day. young friendly artsy people come in and out. before them a dogowner friend lived there, with Geo the one blue eyed dog. and before that long ago we heard the space was a winery, a french winery i won't attempt to spell, but which is now a ladida winery in sonoma.

i like how things out here keep changing, but simultaneously (literally--except for earthquakes i guess) stay still. i like how the liquor/party store on 24th street has the name of a now ghost italian market in beautiful inlaid marble cursive in front of their doorway.

so, i will take this opportunity to give a barebones outline of the possible origins of my where should we live confusion. i was born in new brunswick new jersey and moved at age about 3 weeks to the college town of newark delaware. here i lived in a suburban split level with lots of lawns and sidewalks and a walk to school, but also backed up to a little wild area, a forest behind a park, with a stream (well, maybe a storm sewer but we used it like a nice stream) where we built dams, collected frog eggs etc. age around 8 parents split. now we spend some time in an apartment building with a big common lawn area. then my mom moved to the country outside the town, to a 300 year-old house that backed up to a preserve, with big trees, a real creek with fish and eels, flying squirrels, deer, raccoons, foxes, squirrels. for about 10 years my brother and i split our weeks between the suburb and the country. college in the college town, seemingly safe but actually creating enough excitement that life was kind of dangerous. then on to philadelphia, with friends in warehouses and bands everywhere and a lot of the walking life. then we moved here.

did i mention six months spent living at bethany beach?

so, not sure what this all means but thought i would share.

another friend's blog

here is my friend nat's search for his favorite favorite thai dish

miss you nat. i'll check out some thai places and report back!

more 24th street

something in the groove this afternoon, maya snoozing after our big morning at the randall museum with jay alexander the magician. miles helps me in the kitchen, really, separating butternut squash seeds from pulp out on the deck and then spreading them with olive oil and salt in a pan to roast. he draws a knight and dragon scene while i attempt to make butternut squash soup with our eatwell farms produce (and screw it up by not measuring). as you can see there has been lots of art-making lately.

after maya wakes i push the double stroller down 24th street in search of pumpkins. we explore someone's furnished open house and check out his artwork and play in his backyard a little. this is the guy who puts cool big photos of glamorous men in drag in his storefront window. i guess he is moving on. right next door is virginia from the vintage clothing/cool cd shop, looking...quite pregnant. her puffy face and big tummy are a shock as since the kids were born i have been the ex-cool person and she the cool unencumbered one, always so friendly. now she is due in 9 days. when she asks us what we are up to we tell her we are looking for pumpkins and miles asks where she got the pumpkin in her window. she gets it and gives it to us which for some reason makes me feel quite joyful.

it is perfect weather this afternoon.

we find more pumpkins at the produce place a few blocks up, and get one for her shop. we stop at the water park across the street. there is some full-on little boy nudity which makes miles concerned about the pants police. soon a little girl is directing him in a hide-and-seek game. maya is alternately smiling and being extremely territorial towards a little blonde miles with a nice dykey mom. maybe i shouldn't write that. i don't know. a mom recognizes maya from her days in bernal heights with her babysitter and they have a brief chat in spanish (aaahhh, goes part of my brain, should we look into putting miles in immersion kindergarten or not i don't know i don't know i don't know). walking home we bump into sheila who reminds us of brian's birthday. it used to be a big part of our lives. sheila looks happy and good as usual, heading to the hardware store to get eco-bulbs to go in the htrift store lamps she got her man for his birthday.

later i fantasize about making potero avenue into a pedestrian mall. what would it take to do this? how many billions of dollars or years of urban decay?

maybe i will have some time to think about things later. right now there is very little time for that. thinking. or much else but mommying.

goodnight.

well, this is annoying. i can't seem to get back to the normal type. writing in italics makes it look like i am writing a dream. maybe i am. on the bus to city college today i was fumbling for quarters and a woman who spoke only spanish paid for me and would not accept my cash once i found it. everyone on the bus was just smiling at me and i assume it was because maya is so freaking cute and was smiling and yelling "hello" to everyone she made eye contact with. at city college there are russian nannies and hip mamas and chinese grandmas and some stay at home dads and cool irish ladies. more talk about where kids are going to school. intriguing talk about unknown neighborhoods not too far from here that are family friendly. read: no one hallucinating and spitting and wearing only a pair of drooping hospital pants, pushing an iv on wheels on the way to the liquor store. on the way home we stop in noe valley and maya definitely singles out homeless people to yell hello to. "hello man. hello bag. hello bag" she says, smiling her largest at a homeless man with a big yellow suitcase. he smiles back.

we were in santa cruz this weekend, rented a big house for my visiting family. it is an emotional and busy 3 days, meeting my sister's new baby, not feeling enough time with my dad. old old feelings resurfacing while chasing kids around. once every year and a half is not enough time with these people in my family. i made the choice to move out here, though. it was me. in a bad parenting moment, after hugging my dad goodbye and having a tiny cry, i tell miles that when he grows up he has to stay near us. "i already decided", he tells me, "i'm staying with you. but maybe i can take some trips, maybe for a few weeks, maybe to someplace like delaware. and you can come with me. and poppop john can take us fishing. does that sound like a good idea?"

yes.

and a wierd talk with my husband. i have been keeping all this where should we live stuff to myself and this blog, as it was driving rich crazy. but we talk about it a little on the way back from santa cruz, and he is not thinking the same way i am about the city. his music friends are here, his work. but he is working all around san francisco, and not liking all of it that much. and he is feeling like our street is just too much. someone recently stole his backpack out of his work van which he just left unlocked for a few minutes while he ran inside. the backpack had a little guardian angel his grandma gave him. and then a few days later he found the backpack, wet, hanging about 8 feet high in a tree behind walgreens. creepy. so he is feeling a little negative, and wouldn't miss the city if he moved to, say, pacifica. i think i would. my friend gradiva wrote to me about how in other places people must not have as many stay and go moments as here (i have to stay here, i have to leave here depending on a small event) and i know what she means. there is a lot of cool stuff going on and a lot of crappy stuff going on and that's what is making it hard for me. but as all the people i am close to become more scattered and busy and far away and the idea of an urban tribe type community fades or is on hold i think i am becoming more attached to this place. a place with peaks and valleys--but a place that is not going anywhere.

my best friend, if you are reading this, i wish you were still here.

and anonymous, whoever you are, thanks for leaving a comment!

safety

tonight i started a writing class way up on a hill in noe valley. when i walk to my car at 10:30 it is super quiet. i see little twinkly lights from hills all around. no shoping carts, it would be too hard to push them up here. a man locks his car with the remote and the beep makes me jump. as i get in my little honda civic a man is across the street and i feel a touch of panic, he is a serial killer in the guise of a young urban professional and is going to push his way in. luckily he does not choose me to be his victim. back by sf general i find a spot around the block by the parking garage. i hear the little house of young party people laughing. a blond woman is walking from the hospital, looking nervous. traffic is coursing as usual down potrero, a stereo blasts bad r and b. i pass our backyard neighbors' apartments, lily's shop, the building pat manages and round the corner to my street. there is the usual paper blowing around, and sparkly glass, and i know for sure there are mentally ill and/or heroin addicts nearby having hallucinations, shooting up in the walgreen's parking lot, or throwing their empty bottles into the street by the bus stop. but i don't feel that panic i felt up on that pretty clean hill. it's certainly not safer here. i get to my door and see the miles-made decorations plastered on the glass and i am home safe. it feels safer because it's what i know. for good or for bad my fight or flight mechanism has adapted to life at 23rd and potrero, the mission, san francisco 2007.

hardly strictly

yesterday we drove across town with the new unhappy maya saying many variations of no and mine and no and my turn and made it to golden gate park without me yelling at the kids to BE QUIET SO I CAN DRIVE. i am proud of myself for this restraint. i was so ready to get out of that car my subconscious tricked me into misreading a streetcleaning sign so we could just park (the gods were with us, no ticket!). maya calms down and we enter the park and see lots of big yellow schoolbuses in front of speedway meadow. this is the special friday morning presentation of the hardly strictly bluegrass festival for san francisco middle schoolers and the general public. we set up a little blanket and watch the kids file off the buses. there are many many of them. they seem pretty happy to be out of school on a sunny friday morning. miles is a killer whale chasing maya and i around the field. soon we are joined my my dad and penny and suling and mike and natalie. poor cranky maya requests night night stroller and actually gets in her stroller and conks out while huge amps are pumping bluegrass music and 4000 middle schoolers are booing their lungs out at a cool supervisor's bad jokes, delivered in a great irish accent (what's the difference between a teacher and a train? the teacher says throw that gum away now and the train says choo. choo. now stop booing me you kids.). a few kids get on stage to breakdance to bluegrass, which is a surprisingly successful cross-cultural experiment. another kid somehow manages to tell this joke on stage --your mother is so stupid she went to the clippers game to get her hair cut. the irish accent we are too far back to see tells him that kind of joke is not nice.

i hear all this from various spots in the woods around the meadow. my dad is jiggling maya's stroller and miles has me all to himself. he is a baby eagle who can't fly yet and is separated from his mother. he is a lost baby raccoon who needs me to catch fish for him. i keep peeping from the woods to see if maya has awoken and almost each time i see another one of my old students from sfusd special ed making their way to the concert on a quiet shortcut path. they are all looking large.

then the person who puts on this huge event says a word or two. and the new sfusd school superintendent. and the parents of the journalist who was murdered, daniel pearl. the school district is declaring his birthday world music for peace day.

i am holding my giant baby eagle on my lap and watching all these big loud happy kids and suddenly find myself crying a little. it's happening a lot lately. my dad asks me if they have events like this in all big cities . he doesn't think a city like baltimore would. i don't know. breakdancing, free bluegrass, middle schoolers in a sunny field, bad funny jokes in an irish accent, the somehow steady sounding parents of a murdered peace-promoting young journalist. this city makes it all come together sometimes.

super geek and little super geek

hi

when i was in 7th grade i won a school-wide essay contest (i kind of peaked in 7th grade or so, getting 2 stories published, winning the county spelling bee, winning essay contests). then i discovered boys--not that they discovered me for a while longer.

my essay topic was given to me for the contest "a day without gravity". i have absolutely no memory of this essay's content. the winners received a year long subscription to a magazine of their choice. i chose national geographic
and i actually thought this was the cool thing to do. i soon found out from my friends, who were pretty geeky themselves,that i should have chosen something different--most likely
tiger beat. oops.

anyway, i am spending too much time reading things on the internet lately and keep coming back to national geographic online. it is pretty cool, i think. but what do i know?

miles loves national geographic for kids. he reads it crouched by the door on the bernal heights library floor. poor guy, doomed to be nerdy like his mom. or maybe his father's cool rock guitar hero's genes will balance things out.

sweet dreams