why can't i be facebook normal?

my husband is out at band practice, the kids are sleeping, and here i am at home with my dear computer. the weekend will be a swirl of soccer games, birthday parties, picnics, and the ever present background noise of michael jackson singing "abc, 123, etc."--miles' new passion.

i really miss my old friends and the close connections i once had with them.

i wanna know what is wrong with me and why i can't jump into facebook and enjoy myself like everyone else. wouldn't i feel so much more connected and close with all the people i know? wouldn't all the distance (time, miles) between me and these wonderful folks from my past melt away? i just looked through facebook for a while like a super shy guest afraid to go in to a party. or perhaps a stalker. seems like facebook would be my dream come true, but for some reason i am afraid or unable to join in the fun.

i miss you far away guys, and i guess if i went on facebook and said just that i would be a huge dork.

jd